I’ve been at this moody phase for weeks. Perhaps it was the cough, which has cleared up, thank goodness. But I am feeling a certain weakness in my psyche that I cannot fix.

I don’t feel confident. I think every piece of my work sucks to the core. No redeeming factors, nothing.

I can’t do a shoot for nuts. Most of the time I have no idea what I am doing. Hate it when they try barge in on my ideas. When they do, I shut off and develop this huge resentment for the project. Most of the time I would try to finish it up as soon as possible and I shudder when they request to play the trailer.

I am tired. I need some rest.

I want to rest. I want to not squeeze in the public transport also known as the sardine can.

Don’t think I am ever gonna make it big. Never.

Never. Really.

Oh I feel so full of crapshit now. Bah.

. . . . .

No lah during shoots I do know what to do. But I am always skeptical about my concepts. Really.